Glycerine

Must be your in that I'm sinking in
Must be for real cos now I can feel
And I didn't mind
It's not my kind
Not my time to wonder why
Everything's gone white

And everything's grey
Now you're here now you're away
I don't want this
Remember that
I'll never forget where you're at
Don't let the days go by

Glycerine

Set back up just to be knocked down.

Seriously what are you doing?

Twenty two days until my birthday. I am not really excited about it to be honest. I am excited about June 22nd that is when we go to see TNA in Cincy. Dad, Brad and myself are going to see that show.

Dad asked me the other day he said now I am just saying so dont read into it. I said ok shoot. He said IF you and Taylar were to get back together would it be the same. I said at first no it wouldnt be. I said it would take sometime to forget things. I told him the story of what all went down when we first got together. I said it took me a while to be able to let go of that. I said but after I did that I was fine. This would be the same case I told him, but I told dad that I feel like she doesnt want that kind of relationship with me anymore. He said do you think she is with someone else? I said to be honest I am not sure. He said what do you think happened? I said well we both were comfortable and I felt like I didnt have to try as hard because she was living with me and yeah I took her for granite but I didnt mean too. I said in her weak mind frame at that time wanting me to see all this without talking about it, I really think someone may of came along and said all the thing she wanted to hear. I said I am not sure but something has to be up because she just walked out and didnt even try to get a hold of me or nothing. I said that really hurt dad. I dont understand how someone that loved me so could just do that. He said yeah seemed really odd how she did that. So I said when she told me where I stood she didnt give an inch and she told me she didnt want this right now and that was that.

I told him about Chelsea and that she had just got out of a relationship at the same time I did. I said right now we are really helping each other in our situations. SHe is trying to help me understand how a girl can just up and leave. She has some answers for what she thinks and sometimes she is just like I dont know why its hard to say. I said right now she is just a friend who is helping me keep my mind off things and helping me talk about things when I want to talk about them. I told dad Taylar says she wants to be my friend but she acted weird on the phone the other when she called to aske about Brad. I said I dont know what is going on. I thought maybe we would be able to get into something on one of my five days off, but that didnt happen. She works another job now so time is limited Im sure. I would call her to see whats up but I know if I called and left a voicemail and I didnt get a call back I would be tore up all over again.

Just such a messed up frame of mind right now for me.

Looks like we may be getting a new T.V. because the one in the front room is getting a blue shadow at the bottom of the screen. Looks like a new wide screen lcd is in our future.

Elite XC = Let Down

Man what a day, just mentally exhausting...